Garden cross spider
As a garden cross spider you would rebuild your entire home almost every night – and recycle the old one by eating it.
The cross on your back
Araneus diadematus is the plump orb-weaver of gardens, hedges, woodland edges, sheds and window frames across Europe. It gets its name from the pale spots forming a cross on its abdomen. Females grow to around 1–2 cm in body length by late summer; males are smaller and slimmer. Despite eight eyes, you would see poorly. Your real sense is touch: fine hairs and slit organs on your legs read every vibration in the silk.
You hatch in spring from a silk egg sac, in a ball of tiny yellow-and-black siblings that scatter when disturbed. Many young spiders disperse by ballooning, letting out a strand of silk and drifting on the wind.
A web against the clock
An adult builds a classic orb web, often 30 cm or more across, usually in the evening or early morning. The frame and spokes are dry silk; the spiral that catches prey is coated with sticky droplets. The whole thing can take under an hour. Because the stickiness degrades and insects damage it, you would take most of it down regularly and eat it, reusing much of the protein.
You wait at the hub or in a retreat nearby, connected by a signal line. When a fly, wasp or moth hits, you rush out, bite it to inject venom and wrap it in silk. Your venom is harmless to humans; the bite, if it happens at all, feels like a mild sting.
Love is dangerous
In late summer males stop building webs and wander in search of females. A suitor plucks the female’s web to announce himself and approaches cautiously, because she may treat him as food. After mating, the female lays hundreds of eggs in a silk cocoon in autumn and dies with the first hard frosts. Your story would span about one year, if a bird, wasp or shrew does not shorten it.
